Pay No Attention To The Parrot

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Mrs. Lewis lived a good long life
Before it ended here tonight
She once was so gorgeous
Then of course rigor mortis
Hit her like a meteorite

I see a lot of bodies at work
But not the kind of bodies that twerk
No I’d say more often
They’re lights out in a coffin
Good thing I’m not afraid of the dark

But there’s one thing I fear
More than sadness or tears
And it hits me when I least expect it

That’s a fit of the giggles
Starting right in the middle
Of a funeral and I always regret it

Imagine then my surprise
That we found by her body’s side
A tropical parrot
With a titanic talent
For talking ‘bout his owner who died

When we let him attend the wake
He made me laugh so hard I shake
Freakin’ squawking the psalms
‘Cause his mama’s embalmed
I just couldn’t keep a straight face

There’s one thing I fear
More than sadness or tears
And it hits me when I least expect it

That’s a fit of the giggles
Starting right in the middle
Of a funeral and I always regret it

A couples word to the wise
If your pet knows how to fly
Has feathers and a beak and
Understands when you speak
English like a logophile

Do your friendly undertaker a solid
And teach your wordy pet some knowledge
‘Bout when to be silent
So we’re not laugh-and-crying
It’ll make for better mourning I promise


 - November 2020 -                                                                                                                    #410